Have you ever been in a relationship where you felt you could love someone till it hurts? You adore the person for everything that person is and is not. A complete acceptance of that individual, the thing that person lacked and had. Well, I have had that. The purpose of this blog is to share my feelings but to bring clarity to this aspect of love--admiration and why we do such.
It's not a secret I have loved my ex, it's apparent to the world. It is also apparent that he did not, do and will never be the man I deserve and need--he's not mine to be had. This is something that has brought me much anguish--wasted years, wasted emotions, regrets of not choosing another man and just plain resentment. This feeling of resentment and anguish has passed...for you who is experiencing such, it will pass as well. You have to realize where the feelings of anguish and resentment started from, and I will break it down for you.
When?
When you do not love yourself, am unsure of yourself or have low self-esteem, you oftentimes search for the qualities you lack in yourself in someone else. I find with most people, they find a piece of something they lack in themselves in their significant others. If they lack the motivational drive, they'll see a motivated person. When a person lacks spiritual strength or is conflicted by his or her own spiritual deviation, that person looks for such lacked quality in someone who is evidently spiritually fortified. People look to others to complete themselves. Oftentimes, they are disappointed. Another person cannot give you the quality they possess, only you can give that to yourself. Most people are only disappointed when they realize it. We have the power within ourselves to change us--not others or have others change us.
In a relationship, our problems follow us still. If a significant other is fighting with him or herself, there is nothing you can do about such--that person must fight his or her own battle. We oftentimes call that person self.
It's not a secret I have loved my ex, it's apparent to the world. It is also apparent that he did not, do and will never be the man I deserve and need--he's not mine to be had. This is something that has brought me much anguish--wasted years, wasted emotions, regrets of not choosing another man and just plain resentment. This feeling of resentment and anguish has passed...for you who is experiencing such, it will pass as well. You have to realize where the feelings of anguish and resentment started from, and I will break it down for you.
When?
When you do not love yourself, am unsure of yourself or have low self-esteem, you oftentimes search for the qualities you lack in yourself in someone else. I find with most people, they find a piece of something they lack in themselves in their significant others. If they lack the motivational drive, they'll see a motivated person. When a person lacks spiritual strength or is conflicted by his or her own spiritual deviation, that person looks for such lacked quality in someone who is evidently spiritually fortified. People look to others to complete themselves. Oftentimes, they are disappointed. Another person cannot give you the quality they possess, only you can give that to yourself. Most people are only disappointed when they realize it. We have the power within ourselves to change us--not others or have others change us.
In a relationship, our problems follow us still. If a significant other is fighting with him or herself, there is nothing you can do about such--that person must fight his or her own battle. We oftentimes call that person self.
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